Why Can Verbal Instructions Be Difficult to Remember When You’re Dyslexic?

Forgetting something you were told does not automatically mean you were careless, uninterested or not listening. Many people who forget spoken instructions were listening closely. The information simply did not stay put.

For some dyslexic adults, this is a familiar pattern. It is not universal, and it is not a test for dyslexia. Plenty of dyslexic people remember spoken information well, and plenty of people who are not dyslexic find it hard.

Hearing, understanding and remembering are different steps

Hearing an instruction is the first step. Understanding it is the second. Holding on to it long enough to act is the third. Difficulty at any stage can make it seem as though the instruction was never given.

Spoken words also vanish as soon as they are said. Unlike a written note, you cannot glance back at them.

Why spoken instructions can slip away

Verbal working memory

Working memory is the mental space where we hold information while we use it. The verbal part handles words and sounds. Some dyslexic people find this space fills up more quickly. My guide to working memory and dyslexia explains this in more depth.

Phonological processing

Many dyslexic people process the sounds of language less automatically. Unfamiliar words, names and terms can be harder to catch and keep, because there is less to hook them on to.

Unfamiliar information takes longer to process

New information takes more effort than familiar information. While you are working out the first part of an instruction, the second part may already be arriving. The first part can be lost while you process the next.

Several steps at once

“Log the order, email the supplier, update the tracker and let Sam know by three” is four tasks and a deadline in one breath. Multi-step instructions put the greatest load on memory.

Names, dates, numbers and sequences

Details with little meaning attached, such as reference numbers, dates or the order of steps, are often the first to go.

Distractions, noise and stress

Background noise and interruptions compete for attention. Stress and anxiety can also reduce the working-memory space available. If you are worried about forgetting, you may have less capacity left to remember.

What this can look like

At work, it might be a quick briefing in a corridor that you only half remember by the time you reach your desk. In training, it might be a demonstration with several steps. On the telephone, it could be a reference number read out too quickly. At a medical or bank appointment, it might be advice you cannot quite recall afterwards. At home, it might be a list of things to pick up on the way back.

At work, it might be a quick briefing in a corridor that you only half remember by the time you reach your desk.

Why familiar routines can feel easy

You may manage complex routines at work with ease, yet struggle with a new instruction. That makes sense. Familiar tasks are well practised and need less working memory. New information has to be held in mind from scratch. It does not mean you are being selective or inconsistent.

Why “I told you already” does not help

Being reminded that you were told can feel embarrassing, and it does not bring the information back. It can also make people less likely to ask for clarification next time. A quick, neutral repeat, or a written note, solves the problem faster.

Practical strategies

These ideas help many people. Try a few and keep what works.

• •Ask for important instructions in writing, or for a quick follow-up email.
• •Ask for information in short stages, or one instruction at a time.
• •Repeat or paraphrase it back: “So first I…, then…?”
• •Take a moment to make a note before moving on. It is fine to say, “Just let me write that down.”
• •Add actions straight into your calendar or task manager.
• •Use checklists for tasks you repeat.
• •Use voice notes where appropriate, and only record other people with their consent.
• •Send a brief confirmation email summarising what you will do and by when.
• •Ask which part is the essential action and which is background.
• •Agree priorities and deadlines clearly, especially when several tasks arrive together.

Dictation, reminders and note apps are covered in my guide to technology and assistive tools.

For managers and colleagues

Clear instructions help everyone, not just dyslexic colleagues. Lead with the main action. Give one or two steps at a time. Follow up anything important in writing, with deadlines. Check understanding by asking what the person will do first, rather than “Does that make sense?”

None of this means speaking slowly or simplifying the content. The aim is to reduce the load on memory, not to question someone’s ability. If you are unsure what helps, ask. My article on reasonable adjustments at work has more ideas, and Access to Work may help some employees with support beyond standard adjustments.

None of this means speaking slowly or simplifying the content.

When to seek further advice

Everyone forgets things sometimes. That is ordinary.

If memory difficulties are sudden, new or getting worse, do not simply put them down to dyslexia. Dyslexia is lifelong, so a change from how you usually are deserves attention. Speak to your GP or another suitable professional.

Where to go next

Meetings bring many of these demands together, which I look at in why meetings can be difficult when you’re dyslexic.

If you would like to understand your own learning profile, an adult dyslexia assessment can help. If the main question is what would help in your job, a workplace needs assessment looks at your actual role. My guide to how the two assessments differ explains more, and if you are wondering whether to raise this at work, see should I tell my employer?. Many people find practical strategies and a supportive manager make a real difference too.